Assalamualaykum, hi peeps!

I know i have not been constant with updating my blog,as usual but this time i wanted to make a change. Im not sure it is me or just the blog things but i do feel like something need to change. Before anything change, lets just talk. I mean, lets just have some expressing session.

I know i cant literally hear what you guys said or reply any of it, but if anyone do want to reach out to me, just used any medium available, i guess the comment section is pretty handy.

Yes, i know im talking to a bunch of strangers. I guess its easier to do it with people you dont really know. You might judge me but i dont care. I jut need to clear my lungs out. Its my own therapy to avoid over stress. I use over stress because it is a depression.

Sometime i do think i need my own therapist because i just feel like probably i do have any mental health issues. Im not trying to gain sympathy but that is just how i feel. Some part of me do feel like i have bipolar disorder, i could be happy and very sad. I would smile and laugh but at home, in my room, i would just feel sorrow. Social media do keep me occupy. It is actually easier to ignore any sign and symptoms and any shits because ignoring is just easier.

Things are getting better. My friends treat me better or at least i feel happier around them. I feel human again.

Im not sure if im building more walls or crashing them. I keep on trying to make at least something out of it. I might be doing it right or maybe wrong, im not sure. I guess, it would be easier to keep on being me and see how it actually go.

Trust takes time.

I see girls who were scared of driving but now, they are fearless! I know women out there are still struggling to do things that might be too heavy or scary for a woman but that does not make it impossible. You see, if we put our mind to it, eventually, we could make it reality. The first step is always the hardest. Especially if you are not sure where to start. A passion is nothing without an effort.

Above all the things holding you back, do not let 'YOU' holding yourself back.

I guess the last thing i have for you people is, always be happy with yourself. Don't mind your own flaws, make those as strength to be the metal, the pole, the back bone and the concrete for a better use. Be there for your mum who is crying is the kitchen. Lean your shoulder for your broken heart friend. Secretly put a cute note in your dad's wallet. Smile to strangers (the non pervert ones). Be as broad and as open as you could to be a loving and positive person.

Yeah, one more. If you heard people saying, kill them with kindness, ignore that shit and be YOU. YOU choose who DESERVE your positivity.