Assalamualaykum~ Hi peeps.

This is literally just a random post. Usually I would post at night but then, it occurs to me that i just need to write these.

Does it ever occurs to you that your plan never works out as plan? Like, you plan to get ice cream instead of getting the ice cream, you got yourself a chocolate bar. Maybe because the ice cream store is close or the flavour you want is not in stock or you just find chocolate bar looks more interesting. There are a lot of possibilities. Each of it, no matter how weird it could be, it still make sense with your story line.

Well, nothing is easy with any possibilities that i had been through. I know a lot of people had been through a lot than me. I always remind myself that everyone is in their own race. You cant expect to be in the same race if your road are not the same.

I am 19 and I am still waiting for what course am i going to proceed.

Others who are 19,

Already in USA with scholarship and having their life as planned.

Already working and has a fiancee.

Already become a CEO of his/her own company.

Still dont know how to read or count.

Already pregnant.

Already got married.

Already have a family.

Already has a degree.

Already die.

That is what i mean by not in the same race.

How can you expect someone in India age 19 who barely have money for its daily meals to be like me, waiting to continue a degree. You cant simply judge someone for being slow or unlucky or too lucky.

Each one has their own storyline.

I admit how much i envy most of my friends or other people. Hoping to live their life. That luxurious life.

Then, it occurs to me....

"yeah, she is indeed pretty but i dont want to wear as revealing clothes. I dont prefer fake lashes. I hate high heels. That clothes looks too tight! "

"I wish i have that relationship. But i dont prefer to go on vacation just two of us. I dont prefer bla bla"

"I want to study abroad but, (i dont work hard enough. There are times i take my education for granted. konon ikut mood punya pasal)"

And it all comes back to me being myself. The pros and cons of being me.

The me that

uphold my principle of dressing up like a Muslim. As decent as i can. I remember back in the days where i would wear handsock and skin sock most of the time im out. How i would ignore people looking at me like im soo shaggy dressing up because I am wearing long and big clothes. Yet, i realise how much i had changed and ignore less about my principle just to be trendy. Its heart breaking to realise how ignorance you are from who you used to be.


study whenever i felt like. Dont work hard enough. Blames the system. Ignorance.

tried to find the guy i deserve but forget that you must not find.

has a lot of dreams but do nothing to fulfil it.

I do feel wronged by myself because i was not working my ass out to achieve what i want. I keep on saying to myself that its impossible. I said a lot of things that pull myself back. I dont even believe in myself.

Yet,

Whenever my friends needed the strength the spirit the right mind, i gave them my best. I told them to get up twice as much as they felt. I convinced them that faith has its own funny want to make us greater and so much stronger.

And whenever i felt the same way, they would say the same things.

Am i the only one that dont listens and ignore everyone including myself? That is the main mistake i guess. I realise it now. I have to start listening.

I start by listening to myself. The good voice within me.

Reminding me about, how much i really want to

study abroad.

travel the world as i please

make my own make up brand or open a make up factory

be helpful in charity

meet the icons like Oprah

meet my favourite singers and actors

write a book


Trust me, a lot of things. Some of it even sound impossible like having my own private jet. As funny as it may sound, thats what i have in mind and i know its not only me.

You guys have a lot in mind too. What we have in common? Our dream of making own parents the proudest one in the world. The time where they can rest and join us on our wonderful journey. Bring them to wherever they want to go. Buy them what they had always wanted. Anything for both of our parents. We are not buying them yet we are giving them whatever that make them happy. Of course they are always the first plan.

As im saying, the new plan? Yeah, create a new one. As you are growing older and mature, you must not forget the 'old you'. The one that has a lot in mind. That dream a lot. Its okay to postpone it. Yes, dreams can wait but time will not!

As the old plan cant be in your way, make it still happen. Change the plan. Plans will always be changing because faith has its funny way to restore the balance of the world. Nevermind, still, make it happen.

As you grow old and grey, trust me, you will miss those days where you were strong. Where you had those chances that you missed. Now, you felt like the world is against you, well they are not. They are with you as long as you are with yourself.

I cant make anything happen by talking and typing. I have to start taking actions. Maybe not now, maybe later. yeah, i as much as i hate the word later because I know i had been taking a lot of time for granted. Waste a lot of opportunities.

I am holding to " Patience is virtue. There will be the right time to take a step. All you have to do is making it happen."

I know im in a very slow motion race. I cant race if i cant see the road clearly. You guys can go on, i will catch up later. :)

Remember, there will always have plan B

Assalamualaykum~

Are you guys excited about what im about to tell?! I do! I must warn, A LOT OF SPOILER ALERT!

This netflix series got me glue to the screen. I am addicted to it. It took me about 3 days to finished the whole series and I AM SO EXCTED FOR THE SECOND ONE! It took me about 4 days to complete reading the whole book.

Yeah, i watched first, then only i read. LOL

Lets get into it.

HERE ARE THE CHARACTERS



OK

1. The characters.

In the series, each characters are built with personality, family, relationship and reputation. If you guys at least watched it, you'll understand why i said this. And for the one that only read it, well let me clarify it for you.

In the novel there are not much of description. They dont say much about each person except for hannah mostly.

I understand, in order to make a series out of it you must built a strong living character into it. I totally get it but not everything is tally with the novel. Yes, not everything.

In the novel,

Tony is clay's bff. He does have mustang.

Coutney has straight parents.

Sky used to be clay's crush.

In the series,

Tony is gay and used to be with ryan.

Coutney is asian with gay parents. And a lesbian too.

Clay was a mentor to his charming baseball senior. They even built his parents characters. His dad dont even exist in the novel (LOL)

Jessica's father in military and such.

Bryce the damn rich pampered kiddo.

Justin who has family problems and such.

Long story short, they actually built a character on their own. In the novel, they dont describe anyone as asian or tall or black etc etc. Yet, I still love it. You better damn watch it~

2. The scene

In the novel,

Hannah describe that she had been having dreams about Justin kissing her in the playground and she knew it was going to happen.

Clay finishing all the tapes in one day. Its more to his reactions.

In the series,

A LOT ok. I mean duh, its 13 episodes not one ehh. So, there are a lot of addiction. It almost go with the flow. I could say most of it are exaggeration. Let me mention some of it that are not in the novel,

the memorial courtney made.

the ball dance where clay and hannah were dancing (the night we met song)

the hiking tony and clay

of course, ALL THE GODDAMN REVENGE. Clay didnt even throw the damn stone to tyler's window.

sorry to disappoint you, courtney and hannah did not made up. so as clay and sheri. LOL

3. Not even close to be a fact from the novel

Clay cycles to school, but Hannah did.

Sky working in monets.

Yeah, FML for the JAH (jessica, alex, hannah) its actually OLLY OLLY OXEN FREE

i said it... LOL

The lawsuit. Not even in the novel

The bakers had shoe shop instead of a drugstore.

Hannah died by pills instead of cutting her veins.

4. Almost similar

Based on the novel, things are much linear i guess.

Bryce did raped Jessica but he only fingered Hannah on the tube.

How much Clay love to looked on Hannah.

Hannah play hard to get with Justin is true but they dont have it in the novel. I mean, it does not describe. The writer.

Mr Potter is the counsellor and THEIR ENGLISH TEACHER

The poem that hannah wrote. The novel and series version are not the same.

Clay got his scar in the end of the novel.

5. My impression about everything

Both novel and the series are excellent. The messages are still the same. The story line are the same with a few touch ups but im buying it. I think, if you guys are as obsessive as I am about this 13rw, then watched and read it. Compare and come out with your own ideas.

I guess that all i have. FYI, I LOVE ZACH. hahahaha!

Thank you for reading till the end!