Friendzone

Hey, Assalamualaykum to Moslems

So, after sometime away from my blogging, today i got a mess in my head.

Do you read about my post entitled HOW I MET YOUR MOTHER? Well this post have something to do with that post.

I decided to just be friend with my boyfriend which last only a few days then we became serious like a couple. In the way i see it, he put more effort after i did that. I thought, he is really serious about it.

It last for more than a month.

But lately, things.....changed. He decided that we should stay as friend. In that friendzone. Honestly, i did not take it easily. I just felt out of control of myself. Just so frustrated. I got so mad.

What so insane about this, he tried to explained about it. He said that being with him makes me unhappy.

I get it.

Then he said about Islam. Well, based on my religion, relationship with a man before marrying is forbidden. so, he technically want to wait. We just stay friends until the time is right, well until we get marry. After you are marry, you can do anything just like other couple.

For some girls, they would say I am lucky and I should be happy with his decision. He really want to be with you. He really loves you. He just want to be the one for you in the right way. A halal love. Unforbidden love.

Its not going to be easy for me. Even he promised that he will stay loyal and he want to marry me bla bla bla.

I just don't buy it okay. I don't care. I still don't buy it. Its not about love.

Love can't solve problems. Misunderstand. Everything happens because of love in the first place.

I'm just so sorry. But i will not be easy not you after this.

If that what you want, then I will treat you like a friend but at first we start as a stranger.

If you managed to gain my trust, I might be nicer. Even i already know who and what kind of person you are, I don't trust you like how i used to.

Just chill. As a friend, you have your boundaries. You don't have to care too much about me like you used to. You don't have to be too nice to me like how you used to. You don't have to chat or talk with me every time like you used to. You said you are a busy guy so be it. Only talk to me if you have something fun to talk about or when you NEEDED. You don't have to worry about me or anything. Just be a friend with limits.

You are not my best friend. Just not. Maybe one day but now, you are not. So, don't try hard to be like a best friend.

Its going to be hard for me but i'll be fine. I had the experience with someone before you. It took me, you existed to be cool as a friend to him. So, it looks like i am not going to find someone else as my partner because i am done with being in any damn shit relationship so, let's face it. Its going to be a very long and new attitude for me to be cool to you as a friend.

So, for now i am going to be kinda shitty with you. If you feel like staying, you can. Do whatever you want but stay within the boundaries. If you feel like i NEVER APPRECIATE you, yeah i am acting like it. Face it, i am kinda a shitty person. You know how i used to act when i am mad. I act stupidly, in your definition.


Thank you for used to be my special one. Thank you for the promises. If you keep it, that would be great but i can't promise you anything because we don't have any bound. I don't trust a guy easily. If you can hang to be my friend, thank you and good luck.

It have nothing to do with 'i love you'. Don't use that to gain my trust because for me, its not going to happen.

If waiting for the halal relationship is what you want, so wait until you are halal with your dear wife then only use the 3 words.