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Assalamualaikum Alhamdulillah

Here is special for Zach. Precious Z.

You guys can see that my tweet handle is Precious Z. It is because i care about someone i called as Z. So much. Maybe too much. LOL

After what happen between me and Nico last time, i never believe that in this young age i will totally like someone as much as i did. This time, no that much but a level of it. You know what i mean.

I am heartless sometime about it. Sometime i take it seriously and emotionally. Sometime, i just let it slip away. Sometime, i just wanna be in a serious relationship. Wow! I just said it. But, i don't. It was just my lunatic mind thinking about that crazy stuff.

I don't know why but every time a long holiday, i will tend to get so jealous towards Z and Miss D. Seriously.

Want me to be honest? Here we go.

She do not bring her phone to school so Z and me at school usually are close. We text and call. At home, not much.

I don't have smartphone so, i don't have all the ws, ig or whatever. No because i don't wanna have one but because my parents know it will distract me so they don't allow me to have one. While Miss D has it all, so, as long as they have Internet, the connection is just fine.

Ok fine i can accept that. Less jealous.

Then, i am a stalker. So, i know that they communicate each other so often. And i hate to admit it but i can see how much in love Miss D towards Z. Of coarse she will never admit it but she had admitted it once last time. Ya Allah, why is it too hard to get over wit it.

I don't know why but i think Z is feeling the same way but, with me he never admit.

I am being honest here.

I wanna let him go but he just never understand why i wanna do so. Its not because of me. Its because of him. For the sake of Miss D.

I just know him, about a year and something while Miss D know him since they were small. Their parents know each other.

And about the 'fake' relay. Well, im not blind. Such a good actors guys.

I have no rights to tell him about who he can be friends with or not because i am nobody to him. I mean, seriously, i just don't have the rights.

I wanna tell him how much i am jealous but, i think he know about my jealousy but, i don't know if he realize that I AM JEALOUS NOW!

When i have the urge to say it, then i think back, does this shows how desperate i am? Shows how control i am? If he accept all my advise, i will be the reason for him being away from his childhood friend. I don't want any of that.

I don't know if im worth it. Because im really not that prefect. Yuna I Want You Back //

Dear Z, I want you to be my special someone but i just can't because i know someone that likes you is close with you. I don't know if i misread. Or if i think too much. But, its kinda obvious. I don't want to lose you but in the same time i don't have the courage to take you in the first place.

I don't know what means by 'love' and i think i am too young to think about something so big.

Maybe what you have with me is actually nothing compare to what you have with Miss D. I don't wanna spoil it. And i don't wanna be a part of it.

You guys seems close and suitable together.

I am not asking you to choose sides because, i just don't want.

I learn about 'backing off' means.