To the whatever

Well, there are so much to speak of. What i kept deep down that i don't understand about it myself. How complicated a simple life can be. When you are 16, you learn practically about teenage love. Because in ten years time, you might get married or already married. Whatever can happens, if you are still breathing in that ten years time.

I always think further up because i do something. Sometime, while i was talking, suddenly i shut my mouth because i thought that my next word might hurt or too sensitive. If they really want to know, i will tell them in a good way telling them how i actually do not want to offence them. I mean it.

Having this long distance relationship, looks hard. Now, we are seldom connecting with each other only make things worst. Do i question your loyalty? I do. How can't i because there is a new alphabet that does not makes sense... Your crush? Your ex crush? Or whatever it is. Well, don't mind me, its just NOTHING to me. I am cool. SO cool about it.

I am mad but, *sigh* i don't want you to know it because i know you are dealing with too much problems now. I don't want to be one of your problem. And i just, it is just a hunch in me saying that you need space. Okay.

Sometime i think, i am considering too much.

My sister had a long distance relationship which works for her because that guy never make her jealous and he never felt jealous about my sister even she told him that she had admires.

Me? I am the one feeling too jealous about you. When you never felt jealous of me.

Oh whatever.

Then i see you being hurt by someone else. People know about you and someone else. I see you feeling jealous about someone else.

Am i blind or i misread things. Well, i don't know and i don't have anything to say about it.

Maybe, things did not work for us. Because we are actually nothing. Right?

Do what you think is right.

You know, i am getting used of being betray or broken so when i see what had happen to you i felt sorry then i see about that new alphabet, i am heartless. Seriously.

At first, i was mad because i care. I am puzzle about what i just knew. Then something whisper to me, you already expect something bad right, maybe this is it. Maybe.

So i am heartless. I am getting used to it.

Have you ever wonder how i will feel if i knew about any of it? I am sorry that you had been dealing with so much stuffs lately, alone. It is not because i don't want to be there but, we are just far away. I know you have best friends, your buddies even i don't know them but at least i know you have someone.

I had been dealing so much too, maybe not the same things that you had been through but i know that telling you any of it will only makes you become worried. If you care.

If you are thinking about the same thing, means telling me any of it will only makes me concern them why that i know is not your problem but more about someone else.

Well, i am sorry for being so far away. If you think having scandal or whatever, help you to feel less alone or whatever, then go on. I am not against you. You have your own rights to do what you want. But just for you to know, things will be different. You don't have to worry about me any more. Seriously. I am non of your concern.

We don't quarrel but we offend have misunderstands. And i know that i am the one who is having all of the misunderstanding. So for being someone like this. If being myself burden you, then just walk away and it will never burden you again.