The forbidden crush(es)

This is super random and very light. I guess I had been writing things that need extra readings and clarification of facts. Here is just something based on my experience and some extra.

I had crushes since I was a little girl. I am not going to mention names or when it happened. So, enjoy :)

You know when you like this boy but deep down you know you shouldn't due to some reasons. So, here are some list.

Do not fall in love with your first crush and take it seriously. I mean it, especially if you have a major age gap. I used to like this boy who aged 5 years older. My obsession, I used to pray so that one day I got a sit near him. Before the year ended, it happened. I was super over the moon that day. LOL He never noticed me tho.

Then, you know when your hormones started to blooms so most guys looked handsome. OMG there was a time, I had crush on several guys on the same time. LOL I even tried to make moves. It was embarrassing to think about it now. I would exchange smiles and tried to act cool around them. Such a disaster. I came back home and waited for them to go online to have random conversations. I guess by those year I took my study more serious (Thanked God) so somehow it managed to distract me from continuing that bad habits tho. LOL LOL

Hurm, had a crush on a guy who i barely see and barely knew. I only heard rumors that he liked me so I pretty excited because it barely occurred to me. I liked him back. I tried to get to know him but it turned out to be a douche. Yupe, not ever liked back someone you barely know. Dont trust rumors. Most of it are full of bull.

Don't have any crush on your cousins.... On my mum's side, majority of them are boys. Of course some of them turned out hella fine. Trust me when i said FINE i MEAN IT. I was excited whenever we have any family occasions. omg... I even ALMOST had a relationship with one of them... I refused because I realized we were so different in a lot of things and it was long distance too. It would be super weird if i end up with him tho. Like, i dont meet any new people because we are from the same family. I'm glad it didnt happened.

This one is not totally forbidden tho. If you are lucky you might get your love return. It happened on some of my friends. If you ever watched any k-drama, you know the terms oppa. Oppa is a term for brother but it could be used if you are closed enough with some older guy who age around like a brother. I'm not sure if you get it but, I had an oppa when i was in school. Maybe oppa(s). I have 2 brothers (by blood) but back then, I was not really close to them and i barely felt like i had any brother. Due to our age gap, most of them left home when i was very young so we didn't spent much time together. So that's why i had a few oppa(s) in school. LOL

The first oppa, I almost confessed my feelings on him actually. We took the same school bus to school. I usually talked with him on the way back from school. One day, he just stopped taking the bus. So, it the confession buried itself.

The second oppa, i love talking with him despite my horrible look back then. He had the sharpest jaw line i ever saw and the most beautiful eyes (hazel eyes) i had seen. I met him again a few years ago and he gained some weight but the eyes are still there tho. He still remembered me. That's nice.

The third oppa, we still talk here and there. I didn't remember how it happened, i mean i remember how we met but i don't recall how he became my oppa. LOL He was kinda nice but have high standard. He kept a few things about him that i found out from my friend. It was funny how i managed to dig shits about him. He knew i used to had a crush on him AFTER the crush was over. He used to have bad taste on girls but im glad his current girlfriend is much much better than before. Of course he had a lot of fans, admirer, whatever it was. Yet, he became my oppa. LOL

Don't even try to have crush on your own friend or best friend. It depends too. I had a few crush on my friends but I just knew they don't feel the same way. Their nice gestures are because they are nice people. They didn't treat me any special, I'm the one who felt that way. I appreciated them till now. It was a few people actually but non of it matters. Sometime, you can just feel it. Don't force people to like you back even your own friends.

I used to like a few juniors. Nothing serious happened. Some of them did had good friendship with me. Most of them because of their good looking and very friendly. Or they were cute. I NEVER make a move on younger boys. I felt wrong in sooo many ways. I think older is better than younger. At some point, you have to take care of them instead on the other way around. I'm not looking for a baby to babysit. They are nice to you because you are older. So respect them back and treat them like the rest.

Lastly, this one is just a piece of advise. It didn't end up good for me personally but it might score you. Don't find someone so opposite of you. Don't like a person up until you have to change yourself into a person who you don't want to be. Try to hard to be close to him. It is not healthy, at least for me. It happened to me twice so, this is just a warning.

You are free to have any crush. No matter who they are. Just be careful on the person you decided to give your all (heart and soul).

I hope you enjoyed it :)