Chapter 9: I think its you (Part 2)

On the way back, we barely say anything. I guess i've been thinking about what we used to be. All the what ifs.

'Hey, you okay?'

'Yeah. Oh, we're here. Thanks for the night Max. *Smile*'

Max lean on and kiss me. I .... I kiss him back. It was just a kiss. Nothing more. I waved him from my door.

I'm not sure why i kissed him back but i didn't regret it. It feels unfair for Alex. How is him competing with Max who i had been together since 3 years ago. I tried to make it as fair as i could. I dont want to hurt him. I never want to loose him as a friend. He is a good friend. So i text him,

S: Are you awake? I just came back from a dinner with Max. I'm just gonna say it frankly with you. I dont want you to get hurt by me. You can find someone else, im fine with it.

A: Did anything happened between you and Max? Are you guys back together?

S: No, not really but he kissed me and i kissed him back.. I felt like im being unfair with you.

A: Oh, honestly im not surprised, you guys go way back. It's not about fair serene. It's about your heart. Love could be confusing and selfish. Here i am feeling the same. We need to risk things to get the better of them. Right now im risking my heart and it's not your fault. I choose to do it. NO one force me. I'm the one pushing myself to do so.

S: You could risk it for someone else. I'm not special. You'll find someone better than me someday.

A: No one is worth more than you. I tried but it's just me wasting someone else's time. Whenever i tried to go out on a date, all i see if your face. Whenever we hang out, I would be sooo happy, i blushed my way home. Now, you're going somewhere else far from me, i might not even get this chance again. Even if you choose Max, at least i could tell myself that i had gave it a try. I have had my chance with you. I can't force you to love me, to like me but i could try. I cant stop you from loving Max or continuing love Max even if we're together but i could try show you that my love for you is unconditional compare to Max. The future for us are full of mystery but I bet it could be a beautiful mystery if we uncover it together. I can't erase your past as much as i cant erase my feelings for you. Both of us are selfish.

S: I might still be in love with Max.

A: I know and that's okay. I still have 2 more dates to convince you otherwise. Now, stop overthinking and rest. You deserve a good night sleep. Night :)

Alex did made a few fair points. I can't control someone else's decision. We decide who we're willing to hurt for. It will never make sense. That's love. Love makes you do crazy shits.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Hey, morning~ (I looked aside and i saw Alex.)

Alex? How?

Hey, morning beautiful~ (Sounds like Max. I looked the other side, it is Max?!)

Wait, how can both of you're here? Am i naked? (looked down, nope) Am i dreaming? I must be.

A: hey Love, you don't have to choose. Just take both of us.

M: True, we'll learn to cope with the three of us. It's not really weird, i mean it is far from norm but we'll be the other type of lgbt community or something.

S: *frowny* OMG this dream is sooooooo weird. I never want to pick any of you but I have too. I can't be with both you at the same time. It does not fell fair to both of you.

A: You mean one must be sacrifice for another person's happiness?

S: I know it sounds mean but rather than being together the 3 of us is just more weird.

M: Think about what I said, if both of you get you, everyone is happy. Are you happy Alex?

A: I am! Last night was amazing, come here.

S: NOOOOOOOO

*awake*

Did i just had the most creepiest dream? I must be thinking too much about them.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Both of them are not in town for the next month because they have 3 races back-to-back. I have sometime to myself. Tomorrow i'll be having my important interview. I'm super nervous and super stress about it. Mrs Jackson told me I should just chilled because the interview is just for paper work. I got this! I need to keep my mind focus on the goal! Maybe i'll try to apply somewhere near home this time.

The interview. (All those bla bla, the writer dont really have much idea on what it is yet. Bare with me)

Interviewer A: Hi, how are you? Please introduce yourself.

Me: Hello :) My name is Serene Sergio, i'm applying for school bla bla. I have been working with red bull in bla bla for 3 years now.

B: You're resume is very impressive. Can you tell us about your recent paper about bla bla.

Me: *Explaining about the bla bla paper*

C: It sound revolutionary. If we give you this opportunity, how will you make a different to the company.

Me: I had been given many opportunities by this company since the day i arrived here. I am very grateful for each of it and even today is one of it. I believe I could contribute in the bla bla department. As far as my experience goes, nothing much had changed there especially the engine area. I'm convince after my graduation, I could work immediately and improve on bla bla department. With all due respect, this area of expertise had been entrusted to men ever since the res bull racing was built, I think this would be a very bold step for red bull racing to make this changes and try something very different this time.

A: Where do you see yourself in 10 years?

Me: I hope i would be the one sitting on that side of the table.

The interview goes on for the next 20 minutes or so. They asked me about my career point and the field that i would apply. I tried my best. I hope they see it.

-----------------------------------------------------------------------------------

I came back and I saw 2 bouquet of flowers laying on my front door. One from Max and another by Alex. What's funny about it is, both of the flowers are the same type of bouquet. I guess they googled the same florist and saw the same catalog. Both of them knew I love sunflowers and baby breath. Sometime i wish i dont have to choose and just be with both of them. *remember the dream I had that day* I rather be single rather being with both of them.

Maybe i shouldnt choose any of them. Maybe.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Summer break

I got home a week early during summer break because i need to be back a week early too. I told both of them that DO NOT COME TO MY HOMETOWN EVEN FOR ANY SURPRISED. I need this break to be with my family and they need to be with their family too.

Me: Dad, if you must choose between Ferrari and Mercedes, which one will you choose? Is it the team you had been loyal to or a team that is winning right now?

Dad: Is that my only options?

Me: YES!

Dad: Hurm, i think i'll go with Mercedes because they are winning. Why would i go with a team i had work for? I should be with a new team especially if they are winning.

Me: Even after you had work with Ferrari for more than a decade?

Dad: Why not? Nothing much changed even since I left. Why take a step behind when you can take a step forward.

Me: ....

Dad: Honey, is there anything bothering you right now? You looked anxious most of the time. Are you and Max okay? Or is it the interview?

Me: We broke up a few months ago... The interview was fine..

Dad: Oh, I'm so sorry honey..

Me: No dad. Max wanted me back but there is another guy who confessed to be on the same day. He is Max's teammate. I'm not sure who I should be with. Both of them are so sweet and made me feel safe. What should I do now... T_T

Dad: That's why the Ferrari and Mercedes. Honey, if Max truly loves you, he had never left even for a second. He might be sorry now but he might leave you again someday when time gets more tougher. I don't know about this other guy but if he was there even since you're with Max, i guess, he must be very patient and very in love with you because he never make a move while you were with Max as you were happy with Max. This is just my piece of mind. You could even choose someone else.

Me: Thank dad. This totally helps me. *Hug my dad* I wanna study somewhere near home this time.

It's always nice to be home. I spend each moment at home like i will never come back. I miss them a lot! My mom even said I was too clingy this time.

---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Beep*

Alex: hey, i heard you're in town. Are you ready for our second date?

S: I'm kinda tired from the travelling. Can we not do it today?

A: It's fine. Whenever you feel like it.

S: Dinner or breakfast?

A: Breakfast.

S: Tomorrow would be fine.

A: Can we eat at your place.

S: Sure sure. I dont mind take in. Anything is fine actually.

A: See you tomorrow :) I'll be there at 10am.

That was fast. I just landed and he was already asking me out.

THE BREAKFAST

Alex arrived on time as usual. He came with some food and brought along a backpack like he was planning on sleepover.

"What's with the bag *laughs*"

"You'll see. Let's dig in! I have some waffles and pancakes. Freshly made from home!"

"You cooked by yourself?"

"It's pancake and waffles, everyone could do that."

He is wrong. Max can't even cook anything by himself. Barely but one or twice he magically managed it.

"Yeah right. What else you got there?"

"Maple syrup. Or are you on any diet? I'm sorry, i mean

"Alex, i never go on any diet even if i feel like im fat. I just love to eat. Thank God for the good metabolism. Just chill okayy."

"Okay, fuhh! Let's watch some nice movies. I brought along these. *some CDs and even a mini DVD player"

"Is that CDs? Do people still used it?"

"Hahahaha! I just wanted to do something different. CDs always give some vibe you know. Childhood vibes, all positive vibes."

"You just never fail to surprise me. Let's watch some."

Alex bring out some popcorn from his bag pack.

"Alex, did you just bring popcorn?! *burst to laugh*"

"*laughs with me* Can i used your stove, im just gonna cook it real quick."

"Make yourself at home *Still laughing*"

"I know you would be too tired to go out to eat so i bring the foods to you. If you want to change into your sweatpants, im fine with it too. I mean, it's your house. Wear whatever that makes you feel comfortable."

"Aw,,,, how thoughtful. Now, go make your popcorn, amma go change my pants real quick!"

OMG this guy. How can you not like himmmm?!

We enjoyed a few good old movies like legally blond 1 and 2, some dumb and dumber. I watched the second movie half way before i felt asleep on the sofa. Technically, i slept on his shoulder for i think solid 1 hour. I woke up, he didn't even moved! Oh, he was asleep too. He looks so calm sleeping.

Its almost 3pm and im hungry again. I'll just order in some lunch. Then I saw Alex just woke up.

"Hey, im ordering lunch. What do you want?"

"Anything is fine. I need to used the restroom."

"Ok, omg you dont need my permission!!"

"I'm just sayinggggg."

So we eat lunch. We didnt talked much but, Alex said this

Serene, i want to let you know. I really love being your friend. If you don't choose me, i'll still be here if you wanna rant about anything or anyone *He smile, the genuine smile*. I'll try to be there okayy. No matter what happened, we'll always be friends :)

I just shook my head. I dont really know what to say. What did I do to deserve someone like him chasing after me...

"Hey, wanna watch the sunset with me? *Alex out of the blue*"

"Yeah, yeah suree. Let me .." *he just grabbed my hand, let's just go. You look fine already :))

He drove us to the hill where I went with Max that day. We stayed in the car and watched the sunset in silence. It is romantic. It's very beautiful and you dont need words to describe it. It's comforting being around Alex.

"Let's find some ice cream before going home."

"Yayyyyy"

Alex send me home with nice amount of ice cream.

'Thanks Alex. I really enjoy the day.'

"No problem :)" *he looked away, i think he is shy*

'I think you have some chocolate smug there.'

"Where.." I lean on and kiss him.. He kiss back >,<

Now, both of us are blushing. 'Im gonna go.' I quickly ran for the door. I waved him as he drives away.

If only the day is longer....